Friday, March 15, 2019


Oh friends. I hope you are ready for some BITCHING.

Today is the day before Spring Break.  OH, how we are all ready for Spring Break.  Me most of all.  But before we get to Spring Break I have to give two exams.  One is at 9 and one is at 1.  The exams were written on Wednesday and I would have copied them then except by the time I had a moment to do it I was SUPER DUPER DONE and really just wanted to go home (this has been a theme of the week).

This small decision turned out to be quite a disaster because THE COPIER WAS BROKEN ALL DAY THURSDAY.

And our admin slash copier magician is out of town so my only recourse was to swear at the stupid dead machine.

I printed the earlier exam at home, which was fine because it was three pages and only ten copies.  Then I printed one copy of the afternoon exam, reasoning that I would give the first exam and then magically find the copier in working order so that I could print the afternoon exam.

I gave the first exam (which is in a different building than my office with its own copier) and then walked upstairs to copy the second exam there.  I was feeling awfully clever and resourceful and was even looking forward using the awesome bathroom in that building after I'd printed the exam, the big clean bathroom that has two whole stalls and toilets where the flushing mechanism doesn't drip water all over your butt while you pee.

(I am pretty sure all work orders sent about my current building are being posted on a highly amusing bulletin board in the Facilities office somewhere)

But when I got to the copier I remembered that a student was coming to take the exam in my office in that exact moment.  So I turned around and half-ran back to my office without making copies or peeing.

The student DID NOT SHOW UP.

The copier in my building was STILL BROKEN.

I tried to print the exam on the printer, willing to hand collate and staple twenty-two four-page exams myself, but for reasons unknown, NO PRINTER IS WORKING EITHER.

At this point I wondered if I was perhaps losing my mind and also if it would be better to just cancel the exam at this point.

After an hour, the student had still not come, and the printers were still not working, so I gathered up my exam and my copy card and my phone and headed to the other building.

A note about the other building.  It is under construction and only one door is open.  If the building was a circle, and my office was at 0 degrees, that door would be at three hundred degrees.  And ALSO ALSO, there is a fence preventing you from going around the short way, so you have to walk basically THE ENTIRE PERIMETER OF THE BUILDING just to get in, and then you have to walk up a flight of stairs and back to about the thirty degree mark to get to the copier.

So I was feeling very put upon when I got to the copier and realized that I HAD LOCKED MY KEYS IN MY OFFICE.

If this was a movie the point where the plot loses credibility is here because when I was checking through the copies I found that the copier had only printed three pages of the four page exam.  And I double checked to make sure all the pages were in the original that I fed into the stupid thing.  And they were all there.

That copier is capable of SPITE.

Ka.  BOOM.

I printed the last page.  Twenty two copies.

And then I went to the police station to get someone to let me back into my office.

When I got to my office to wait for the police, the student was there waiting for me.

But at least I had lots of copies of the exam for them.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You should use Moodle courses, or some other e-learning system. Everything is there ready for tests and learning materials. No copies, no printing. It is not difficult to learn. I did it a long time ago and now is much easier to teach 4 courses (physics and computer programming).

Best regards for you and your children,
Long time reader of your blog (from Europe)