Monday, March 13, 2017

I really need to stop obsessing about real estate

FUNNY STORY.

Right after I pushed "publish" on that last post the school called and asked me to come get Wes, who was coughing so much it was distracting the other students. While I was going to get him I called Ryan to let him know and after he regaled me of the story of the giant screaming fight Wes and James had in the morning that was so out of control Ryan missed the turn for their school, we decided to go look at the bigger house this weekend. And then I took Wes to garden club in the afternoon, where he sat miserably on the bench the whole time looking pitiful, which made my nurse friend wonder if he might have a secondary infection. I took him back to the doctor that evening and SURPRISE! HE HAD THE FLU THE WHOLE TIME!

So basically everything I said in that last post is no longer true. Except I don't think we're moving. We've moved from dismissing the beautiful house to actually walking around in it like some kind of exposure therapy for my house coveting disorder.

Multiple times this weekend we had the following conversation:

Me, hopefully: So, have you been thinking about the house at all?
Ryan, casually, man-like: No, why?
Me: [soul dying sucking sounds]

Perhaps to prolong the inevitable by several months, I impulse bought Charley a full-sized bed on Craigslist, asked Ryan to go out into the rainy darkness to drive an hour round trip to pick it up, and then demanded we clean out the playroom for him right then.

Somewhere along the drive home some of the hardware jiggled its way out of the bed frame and Ryan had to go out AGAIN to Ikea to get replacements only to get home and realize that he was still missing two of those impossible little metal things with the line on top and the hole in the side. Defeated, Charley slept on the mattresses on the floor for the night and I went back to Ikea (ON A SUNDAY AFTERNOON) to get the missing parts. When I arrived, I got number seventy. They were seeing customer number FIFTY.

Anyway. Eventually we got it all set up and the desk moved in there and I LOVE IT. We're all really jealous of Charley's room.

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For now we are asking him to keep the floor clear and make his bed every morning since this is the first thing you see from the front door, but we're really path of least resistance kind of people so I'm sure that won't last.

Meanwhile in the dining room, we have a giant piano:

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This arrangement is...working? Helping me overcome my liberal guilt and admitting we need a bigger damn house?

Honestly the thing most likely to tip the balance is the way we now have to listen to the TV on a very quiet Bluetooth speaker so Charley doesn't hear all the swearing and sex humor on Orange is the New Black as he is falling asleep on the other side of the wall. We might get a therapist's office-grade white noise machine to put outside his door because *that* is not going to work long term. Neither is watching TV in my bed, which Ryan prefers, because that is my winding down place at the end of the day and I like to do that ALONE BY MYSELF.

Ryan had a long talk with a realtor about what would need to be done to this house (starting with removing PERFECTLY GOOD appliances and replacing them with ones that are a different color, which makes declaring a 2200 square foot house "too small" seem even more decadent and absurd) and just thinking about all that work gives me stress hives. BLUETOOTH SPEAKER TV FUNTIME IT IS!

Even James and Mary find this conversation exhausting.

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Anyway, today it is SPRING BREAK!!! We have been to therapy and later we are going to a sketch 1970s roller rink with my friend Rosa and my sister and a whole bunch of kids. Followed by happy hour, obviously.

2 comments:

Chiconky said...

Eli's room shares a wall with our TV and so I am very curious about any solutions you might find. Because yelling "Don't listen to that! GO TO SLEEP" is... sub-optimal.

Anonymous said...

We have wireless headphones for watching TV at night. I don't know anything about them, but the brand name is Sennheiser.