Wednesday, September 3, 2014

I am writing this under duress

It's been a while, you guys. I'll tell you what happened: Ryan went out of town during my first week of class. Uh huh. Thankfully my parents swooped in to the rescue. WE RAN OUT OF DRAWER SPACE THAT'S HOW MUCH LAUNDRY WAS DONE ALL AT ONCE. That has, uh, never happened before. In fact you wouldn't know the kids HAD dressers by the look of the upstairs hallway. They also straightened the garage and created a That 70s Show-esque living area for the kids and their cohort out there, cooked dinner multiple times, and gave the kids SO MANY BATHS. Everything is super clean around here. Or it was until I was back in charge and then pbbbbbth. It was a fun week. And it wouldn't have been that way without their help.

Before Ryan left on Sunday he went to urgent care and was diagnosed with strep, making him the third family member on antibiotics in four days time. He came home to find me completely overwhelmed and suggested to the boys that they take me out to a special breakfast instead of going to church. Fighting through an hour-long worship service only to go home and go it alone for the next seven hours until bedtime was making me kind of despondent. Breakfast was the perfect suggestion.

About twenty minutes in we realized that we hadn't taken the kids to a waiter restaurant in a long, LONG time. AND IT SHOWED.

Wes turned his muffin appetizer into a cupcake with frosting made of straight butter. Mmmm delicious.

Mary drinks out of a straw cup just like a person now. I find this hilarious.

Not pictured: My eggs benedict or pomegranate mimosa. It was a good way to start the day.

Monday afternoon Charley came home complaining of a stomach ache and nausea and finally admitted to SWALLOWING A DIME. I only halfway believed him but our pediatrician's nurse said it would be best to go to the emergency room because based on his symptoms it could be causing a BLOCKAGE.

I believed him more when he almost hurled in the xray room and even more still when the xray popped up on the screen and THERE WAS THE DIME. The doctor said it was past the danger zone and would pass naturally so in the end we spent a hundred bucks for Charley to lie in bed watching TV and enjoying freshly warmed blankets for a couple of hours. That's about what we pay for his therapy, though, so we'll just call it an extra session. On the way home I told him to let me know if he noticed the dime in the potty and he said "Why, do you need it back?" and I said "No, we can find ten cents an easier way" and he said "Five cents" and I corrected "Ten cents" and he said "No. Five cents." And I asked him "WHAT THE HELL KIND OF COIN DID YOU SWALLOW?! THE LITTLE TINY ONE OR THE BIG THICK ONE?" He couldn't tell me and I almost called the doctor because he had emphasized the smallness of the dime SO MUCH that I was worried the larger nickel could have been more of a problem. In summmary: I did not call back. The coin has not been reported. I am not interested in knowing the details thankyouverymuch. MOVING ON.

Bright side: My friends are stinking HILARIOUS. Facebook was a funny, funny place for a couple of days during DimeWatch2014.

Mary's teacher gave her PIGTAILS!!

Attempts to recreate this look have been unsuccessful. Baby girl's lucky she has a cool aunt who lives nearby.

Charley has been a DELIGHT with the younger kids recently. Today Mary crawled into his lap and put her head down. SWOON.

Ryan took the kids to a barbeque place near their school for breakfast tacos this morning as a treat. I asked Charley if he's gotten his usual potato egg and cheese taco and he responded "Yeah, with a side of spicy chop!" Then he told me he could smell the smokey barbeque place smell on his clothes all day and it had made him happy every time. My little Texan!

After dinner Wes went to choir and the rest of us went out front to enjoy the absolutely frigid ninety-five degree weather by playing catch. It's NOT A HUNDRED! FALL IS COMING! I feel like we should prepare some kind of pagan Equinox festival. Anyone know where I can buy a large wicker cage? Amazon Prime?

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