Thursday, July 3, 2014

Professor Wes

Wes was en fuego last night at my research program's end of program dinner.  He managed to choke down two beef tacos before descending on the table of potluck desserts.  On his first trip he found a small piece of Texas sheet cake, some cookie cake, and a chocolate chip cookie.  And then later I saw him with a popsicle, and another cookie, and then another popsicle.  And I kind of lost track of his intake for a while.  And then he had some Fresca.  That must have been too much because then he threw up on the patio.  I told him to stay on this bench by some bushes just in case it happened again but instead he climbed behind the bench into the garden under a large bush and hid, giggling maniacally.

As we were leaving he started an ice war with Charley and James and the daughter of the director of my program with a pile of ice someone had dumped out of a cooler.

This was fun for a while before, somewhat predictably, they began throwing handfuls of ice at adults and yelling HAIL STORM!! 

I tried to shut that down but as I was yelling "COME GET IN THE CAR RIGHT NOW PLEASE" Wes hurled one massive ice ball at the back of my program's director and when I expressed horror at his judgement he shrieked gleefully "I WAS AIMING FOR HER BUTT!!!!"


I got him in the car VERY QUICKLY after that and tried to apologize but everyone was laughing so hard I thought it was best just to get the heck out of dodge.

Relative to those shenanigans, bathtime and bedtime were uneventful but when Ryan and I turned the corner to go upstairs to bed we were puzzled to find that the TV in our bedroom was on.

Wes was asleep on our bed in front of Rick Steve's Europe.  It was about Helsinki.

That was not part of the usual bedtime routine.

Ryan put him back in his own bed and I didn't think about it again until the next morning where Wes revealed that he had watched a VERY INTERESTING show about tornadoes.  He was FULL of information.

Here are some facts I learned about storm shelters FROM WES this morning over cinnamon toast:

--If there is a tornado don't go in the basement because the floor could bust in on you or it could flood

--The kind of plywood we use in our houses isn't good because it's just made of lots of pieces of wood glued together, we have to use the other kid with the lines that go down this way and some lines that go the other way (he showed me this part with his fingers).  It works really good when they shoot the hurricane cannon at it because the wood just BUSTS backwards!! (this part left quite an impression on him)

--They tested the other kind of wood (the bad kind) and the wood went RIGHT THROUGH IT!

--The best kind of window is made of two pieces of glass with plastic in between.  When they shot it with the cannon you could see where it hit but it DIDN'T GO THROUGH!!

--You should put your house up on stilts if there is a flood that way your house won't get flooded.

--We know that a tornado is a strong wind that can wreck things so you have to build a tornado place (shelter) to protect you.

Which is a pretty good summary of all the work done in tornado shelters and debris resistant construction done in the last thirty years.  His sneakiness is going to TAKE THAT KID PLACES.  Like graduate school at Texas Tech.  Somehow I think the debris impact cannon would suit his interests well.