Friday, May 30, 2014

The Five Stages of Finding Poop in the Exersaucer

1. Denial

What the...?  That looks like poop in the bottom of the Exersaucer.  It couldn't possibly be poop, that would be disgusting.  It must be something else.  I'll just continue merrily straightening the living room and assuming that's something besides poop.  What else?  I don't know, but it's definitely not poop.

2. Anger

Sniff...sniff... OK that's definitely poop.  WHY DO THESE THINGS ALWAYS HAPPEN WHEN RYAN'S AT WORK?  What is WRONG with these cheap grocery store brand diapers?  Why do I ALWAYS have to take care of these things?  My entire LIFE is DEALING WITH POOP!
3. Bargaining

Please don't step in it, Baby!  Please don't step in it!  No no no please don't step in it!  I promise I'll clean it up just DON'T MOVE ONE INCH RIGHT NOW.

4. Depression

I should just go back to bed.  This is a bad omen.  How good could a day that begins with a giant turd in the exersaucer possibly be a good day.  I will be cleaning up other people's poop for the rest of my life.  I want to go to bed and eat cookies with the TV on.

5. Acceptance

Sigh.  That's definitely poop and no one else is going to take care of it.  If she steps in it it will be ten times harder to clean up.  I'll get the Lysol and a rag and clean it up.


Leslie said...

6th stage: sweet revenge

You realize that one day, far in the future, your kids will have to clean up your poop.

CP said...

So funny... and so true.

Deborah {Wedding Thingz} said...