Wednesday, February 19, 2014

Coyote Ugly

According to various news outlets our neighborhood has "a coyote problem".  In the last few months, several pets have mysteriously disappeared--one was eaten in its own back yard by a coyote who managed to jump the six-foot privacy fence both in and out of the yard.  I guess in that case, "mysteriously" is not the right adverb.

Now.  Our neighborhood Facebook group has a history of, shall we say, over-reaction.  A sample post: "Keep a lookout, everyone, I saw a white van parked in front of my neighbor's house yesterday."  This might generate a half-dozen replies along the lines of "What is the world coming to?" or "Call the Sheriff next time, here's the number" or "Let's bring this up at the next HOA meeting."  I am subscribed largely for the entertainment value.

So when this coyote thing broke, I read it with bemused interest and moved on to other things.  Even after the school sent home a letter regarding the "nuisance coyotes" and advising kids to walk in groups lest they be attacked.

Until Saturday night when I heard HOWLING coming from the greenbelt across the street at four o'clock in the morning.  You guys.  There were LOTS of them and they were close by.

So I am now on the crazy train with everyone else.  Have you read the Wikipedia article about coyotes?  I would advise against it.  Particularly the part about coyote attacks on humans which says "Attacks on humans are rare, but usually limited to children UNDER AGE TEN [emphasis mine] because they are physically smaller."  Well, COME ON OVER, COYOTES!!  WOULD YOU LIKE SMALL, MEDIUM, OR LARGE?!

So, OK, but they're nocturnal, right?  WRONG!  Hahaha!  According to the neighborhood group "three of them walked across the street in front of me in the early afternoon and were not frightened by my car."  HOLY CATS YOU GUYS.

So NOW, the kids are going to have to only play in our yard and the culdesac, instead of in their fort in the woods, which really cramps their style, but I suppose is better than being attacked and consumed by a band of NORTH AMERICAN JACKALS HOLY COW.  And we're going to have to be extra careful with Rossby who likes to dart out the front door and run into his certain doom across the street in Coyote-town because he has a peabrain.

There's talk that they can be "trapped and removed" to another location so if they need someone to pitch in like five bucks I am all ears.  Or maybe we can just paint a tunnel on the side of the mountain and lure one there with a small bird or something.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

We live in the 'middle of nowhere Midwest' and have coyotes of course, since we are in a very rural area. Generally they are afraid of people but can be seen in the daylight crossing fields or roads.
Also, they always sound awful howling at night but I know from experience that just one or two coyotes communicating at night can make it sound like 20-30. They don't usually travel in large packs.
Hope they disappear soon from your neighborhood and return to the rural areas!

Candy said...

They seem to be very acclimated to living among humans, I used to see them in Bellevue WA (picture suburbia with "parkways") when I worked there. Cats are just the right size for them, unfortunately. I hope your city takes care of the problem before you have a nervous breakdown. Hugs and smooches all around...C