Wednesday, July 31, 2013

And the baby pool almost killed me.

No baby yet, but HOLY MOTHER OF PEARL did I hurt myself yesterday.  I have been asking the boys to help me drain the baby pool since Saturday, so I could move it to the other side of the porch, away from the adult seating area under the roof.  Since none of the kids would help me (Ryan would like me to point out that I never directly *asked* him to do it for me, so he didn't know I needed help), I set out to do it myself yesterday morning.

Wes was pretty helpful, getting a bucket and bailing out the water while I held my foot down on the side and let the water drain out (it's a huge pool and it was VERY full), but James kept turning on the hose and adding more water, which was super productive.

Finally I got almost all the water out and was able to drag it over to the new location, but while I was doing that I noticed that it had the gross fish tank smell it gets when the water has been in there too long.  Like six hours.  So I ran inside (HA with the running) and got some 409 and a towel and headed out to the porch to clean it.

I stepped over the side of the pool and onto the bottom, where my foot went out from under me (due to all of the MOLD) and I screamed like I had been stabbed.

I managed not to go all the way down, but have I told you about my pelvis problem?  The one that makes walking and having my legs further than about twenty degrees apart extremely painful?  It's called symphysis pubic dysfunction, which sounds freaking hilarious when you say it with a Borat voice.  So suddenly doing the splits in a algae covered baby pool was... inadvisable?

I spent a few minutes leaned over with my elbows on my knees, deep breathing and swearing and reassuring Wes and James that I was not seriously hurt (I actually have no idea if this is true, because it hurts like a sonofabitch still, twenty-four hours later).

And then, because I didn't want the kids to slip, I crawled around the outside of the pool and 409ed it as best I could (without moving my legs too much, obviously).

When I stood up from doing that I knew that it was time to go sit down.  For a while.

So I went in and sat on "the lifeguard chair" which is a big upholstered chair Ryan pulled into the dining room for me so I could watch the kids in the back yard without actually going out in the back yard.  Pretty soon Wes and James started beating the crap out of each other so I hobbled over to the back door and called out "Who wants to watch a MOVIE?!!"

Then collapsed on the couch and cried.  Charlie set up the movie.  Wes brought me some water and an ice pack.  So I could ice down my crotch pelvis.

And then I layed there very, very still until our babysitter arrived to take the kids to the pool about an hour later.

A day of rest and a night of sleep have helped considerably, but I'm not breaking any land speed records today.  I had to go to the Y to pay Charlie's camp tuition this morning and a nice man held the door for me which he probably regretted since it took nearly two full minutes for me to cross the five yards that originally separated me from the door, which is obviously more than he bargained for when he thought he'd be considerate of the giant-ass pregnant woman (I mean that literally and figuratively).

And getting out of the car is also special because I require a short rest between getting my first and second legs out.  After I get my feet on the ground, I like to close my eyes for a minute and catch my breath before attempting to walk.

But the best news of all is that, thanks to what appears to be a freakishly large baby and the fact that I sobbed through my last OB check (due to the pelvis pain status BEFORE the baby pool slippage incident), I am scheduled for an eviction induction on FRIDAY, which means I go into the hospital Thursday night, where I will be asking for something to help me sleep and also the strongest thing they can give me for pain without a trip to Mexico.  I cannot wait.


Alyssa said...

Yikes! I'm looking forward to your induction FOR you - good luck on Friday!

Sarah said...

that sounds BRUTAL! now I feel bad about my constant complaining about heartburn! can't wait for Friday :)

lonek8 said...

Oh my gosh, that sounds awful! Hope the pain recedes quickly, and I'm so excited for Friday!!

Erica said...

I didn't set anything on fire today. But I did just exhaustedly tell my 4-year-old that the sun orbits around the Earth. Um, anyway, Fridaaaaay!

Candy on Endeavor said...

Holy Mother of Pearl! That is today...great news for you and ZeeBebe.
Happy Birthday too youuuu both. xox

Bridget McCarthy said...

OH! I am SO EXCITED for you! And I feel really bad for your crotch, er, pelvis. I hope you heal QUICK!! I'll be praying for you!