Who sucks now?*
I made hashbrowns! I didn't even know it was possible for non-McDonald's employees to do that, but whaddaya know?
In a fit of gung-ho stay at home mom frenzy several months ago I signed up to teach the three year olds at Vacation Bible School. That was before I learned that I'm not qualified to teach college students, of course, otherwise I might have signed up for something like snack, which has a much less direct correlation to the spiritual development of the three-year-olds of South. It starts tomorrow morning at 8:00. I accidentally said to another teacher who had asked me if I'd made the cute little mailbox for the project yet "They're THREE! I'm just hoping to make it through the day without anyone peeing in their pants!" and then laughed a leeetle too loud to cover up the horror I was feeling at what had just come out of my mouth. Go me.
I did decorate my classroom today, though, and I must admit that it's kind of adorable. Tiny construction paper life jackets with each kid's name on them (there is a camp theme) decorating the door! I'd show you a picture but, you know, all those kids' names. We were about to leave and I suddenly blurted out "Let's use all the extra paper to make a TREE!" and then made Ryan crumple all the remaining construction paper into balls so I could make a colorful tree on the wall of the classroom. It turned out kind of funky/pretty and I bet the three-year-olds will enjoy it. I'm not so sure about their parents who will no doubt be wondering what kind of acid trip I was on when I decided to decorate the VBS room with a purple and orange tree.
There will be FOURTEEN KIDS in my classroom. FOURTEEN. If you don't hear from me again, it will be because they ate me alive.
*Although tonight I intimated to Ryan that if "I had to live one more second in this filthy craphole, nearly killing myself tripping over toys every [redacted] second of every [redacted] day then I was going to lose my [redacted] big time," so I guess I still suck.