Friday, January 16, 2009

Little Adventures

*We have this jar of Mexican vanilla. It is wonderful in recipes, but the lid to the jar is always stuck. While making snickerdoodles last night I tried everything to get the lid off to the point I swear I was going to hear the cracking of little bones in my hand. Finally, with Ryan strapping a screaming Wesley into his carseat so they could go to the store and Charlie whining and trying to climb up my leg so he could see what was going on on the counter, I had had it. I went to the garage, got a drill, and calmly drilled two holes in the lid. Ryan watched, impressed, as I poured my half teaspoon of vanilla and finished making the dough.

*Charlie had his first true public tantrum yesterday and I went all Supernanny on him. You know, react by not reacting. I took them to the mall to get an outfit for Wesley's Christening next week and forgot the stroller. Everything was going fine until Charlie realized that we were leaving and he wouldn't get to push the elevator button again. He melted into a puddle on the mall floor wailing "PUSH BUTTON!! PUSH BUTTON!! PUSH BUTTON!!" "Time to go get some lunch, Charlie, let's go to the car!" I said cheerfully as he flailed on the tile, then slowly walked towards the door of the department store. I stopped about twenty feet away (the mall was deserted, thanks economy) and stood calmly waiting for him. He calmed down after several minutes and wordlessly got up, walked over to me, and took my hand. Take that, Grasshopper!

*Heh heh heh. Hahahahaha. Heee heeeee. Ha. Ha ha ha:
New Suit

*The drive-through lady at Dunkin Donuts made me so mad the other day I almost left without buying anything. Almost. I ordered a multigrain bagel with cream cheese, which is ON THE MENU. She said "We don't have multigrain, we have..." You know how you can't understand people on the little speaker. "OK, I said, how about sesame seed, then" I replied, based on a PICTURE OF A SESAME SEED BAGEL ON THE MENU. "That's not one of the ones I called out!!" she SNAPPED back at me. What the hell?

*This lady at daycare, who presumably has small children herself, saw me coming with Wesley in the carseat and Charlie by the hand and made a special point to close the door right before I got there. You know, so she could be sure I entered my access code and actually belonged there. Because if I was going to kidnap a child from a daycare bringing my OWN TWO CHILDREN and a diaper bag loaded with breastmilk would be a TOTALLY AWESOME DISGUISE. The best part was that she actually STOOD THERE WATCHING ME ENTER MY CODE AND THEN STRUGGLE TO OPEN THE DOOR. She did not offer to help. Tool.

*I grabbed a blanket out of the drier and tucked it around Wesley in his carseat this morning. On the way to the car I noticed that it had a pair of my undies stuck to it.

*I realized yesterday that my "moisturizer" was actually only sunscreen which explains why my face feels like it's ripping every time I smile. I added a real moisturizer to my morning "routine" today and it has been much better.

*The moms of twins club was at the mall yesterday and shamed me into dressing "nicely" today, you know, jeans, sneakers, and a sweater. If they can flat-iron their hair with two eighteen month olds I can certainly change out of my pajama top before leaving the house. Honestly.


Anonymous said...

Mimi had a big meltdown over leaving the YMCA the other day. One of the dads standing in the lobby walked up and offered "she can stay here with me." I gave Mimi the option of staying with this man, and she immediately agreed to leave with me. Hahaha, reverse psychology.

AJU5's Mom said...

Way to be an engineer!

And um, some moms cared a lot more about looks before they had kids. So, don't stress too much about not dressing up! I live in jeans and a sweat shirt or sweater when I got out these days and I only have one kid!

Marianne said...

I love the blanket story ... I'm sure something similar to that has happened to me, but my brain has been deficient since January 2008.

Alyssa said...

I can't believe the daycare lady just stood there and watched! Some people...

Kyla said...

I think I would have said, "Thanks for getting the door!" in the most exaggerated manner possible. Tool.

I love that you drilled the vanilla open. HA!

At least you caught the undies at the START of the day, rather than the end.

Sarah said...

That's hilarious that you drilled the vanilla! And Wesley is getting so big and adorable. What a great post!

sarah said...

Hilarious! I love the underwear stuck to the towel.

And the drill? Priceless. show that vanilla who's boss.

Anonymous said...

Sounds to me like the kind of day to stay in your bathrobe and not get off the couch. I had plenty of those way back when my kids were little. Yeah, big fan of the al day bathrobe day, I was. Damned school had to come along and force me to leave the house.

Staci said...

Don't even feel guilty about skipping the post-Christening party. He'll never remember it. Just slide s few extra birthday party pics into the scrapbook and label them "Christening Luncheon."

Good luck with your mini-defense. We should get together when you get to the old town.