On Monday I caused quite the stir when I described to the nurse on the phone the doubling in size of my ankles and hands that occurred over the weekend and got myself my very own nurse practitioner's appointment.
While I was getting ready for Church on Sunday, Charlie saw me trying to cram my feet, which looked like something you'd buy at a bakery, into my cute little crossed-strap Mary Janes and encouraged me to "PUSHHHHHHHH!!" I can take a hint. I wore my sneakers. Converse All Stars to be exact. The laces provided just enough mechanical advantage to get them tied. And then I sat through an hour-long Sunday School lesson completely unable to move my toes before saying to Ryan "We have to go home. I can't go to church. I am very uncomfortable."
So I called the nurse on Monday and said "I'm sure it's nothing, but my feet and hands were about twice as swollen over the weekend as they were on Friday..."
[urgently] "Can you come in at 2:00?"
My blood pressure and protein were fine, but I had managed to gain four pounds in three days, which concerned the doctor who said it was all from fluid (this made me want to go buy a big box of Hostess Cupcakes immediately because fluid! It's all fluid! Nothing I ATE made me gain all this weight!). So I was sent home with orders to sit around with my feet up as much as possible and to drink 8-10 glasses of water a day (I complained about the water part to Ryan because a "glass" is hardly a standard unit of measure and therefore it is not possible to know whether I am having enough water or not. Also, more water means less sitting around and more waddling to the bathroom).
Sensible advice, but I still had to run some errands, pick Charlie up at daycare, then stand in the sun in the culdesac with my friends for an hour while the kids played, then wait another hour for Ryan to come home before I could start following it.
I was disappointed when the doctor didn't say "You're fine, but I think we should induce immediately... just to be safe."
So here I am... still giant, hot, not sleeping, caffeine restricted, puffy... but certainly drinking more water. I have another checkup tomorrow. Charlie will be there, so I don't have my usual hope of being asked to go straight to L&D (although what a GREAT story that would make! "Here's my birth partner. He's two!"). I'm thinking animal crackers and our garage door opener will provide enough distraction (he has, after all, just reached the age where he will think it's HYSTERICAL that Mama's taking off her pants in public), but it will be during naptime so let's hope it's FAST.