I enter the unfamiliar and elegant department store in my beautiful bridesmaid dress. It is black, strapless, cut to just above the knee and just flowy enough. My hair has been professionally styled into a perfectly messy updo and I am wearing beautiful borrowed jewelery. I head for the shoe department to (hopefully) find something more appropriate to wear to my sister's wedding than these Converse AllStars I have on now.
I frown when I reach the shoe department and find that the clearance section has disappeared. I only have two hours, so I start browsing anyway. An impeccably dressed woman approaches me and asks what I need.
"I am going to be in a wedding in two hours and I need some shoes to wear with this dress" I say, indicating the dress I have on. The dream dress that flatters my every curve as though no human being had ever called the inside of my abdomen "Home".
"Sit down there and I will bring you some things to try on." A well dressed man wordlessly brings me a cup of coffee while I wait, cream, no sugar. Perfect.
A moment later she returns bearing a single box. She opens it to reveal the perfect pair of shoes. A shiny platinum color I never would have considered before, they match the trim on my dress perfectly. She kneels on the floor in front of me and unties the laces to my ratty sneakers and takes them off. Gently holding my foot by the heel she slides the first shoe into place. It fits perfectly and is comfortable. And even more importantly, it is a gorgeous shoe. I would never have described a shoe as "sexy" before, especially not one I would be capable of wearing with my size 10 feet, but this is it. They are perfect.
Ecstatic I reach for the box to check the pricetag. They're ninety dollars. My heart sinks. I could never spend so much on one pair of shoes. But they are so perfect. I decide to buy them anyway and make up the difference somehow. After four years of graduate school my wardrobe consists soley of aging jeans and sneakers and tshirts commemorating field projects that took place years ago. I deserve to treat myself, I reason.
Giddy and a little nervous, I tell the saleswoman that I will take them. She looks at me and smiles warmly. She opens her mouth to speak.
"WAAAAAAAAH! MAMA! na-NAH-na! na-NAH-na! MILK! MAMA! MAMA!"
Damn, it was a dream.