Tuesday, December 5, 2006

I'm a freak

Today Charlie and I went to the coffee shop for a lovely hour and a half of reading and tea-drinking (and some serious carseat sleeping) followed by a walk around the neighborhood. My reading selections included American Baby and BAMS (a meteorology journal). Sometimes I feel like my old self and am eager to get back to working on my research and dissertation and I want to look for a high stress career oriented job for when I graduate and I FEEL like a student and all that crap. Then there are times when I'm pushing Charlie in his stroller or holding him on my chest as he sleeps when I think I can't possibly do any of that because how can I possibly leave him with strangers and I don't want to miss a single minute of his baby-ness and for that moment I don't care about finishing school or what anyone thinks or anything. Anyway I oscillate between those two points of view ten or twelve times every day which I'm sure you can imagine is a little hard for those around me to keep up with. It's also making it quite difficult for me to complete a cover letter that I am working on for another job in Austin. It goes something like this right now:

Dear Mr. Employer:
I am writing to express my interest in the blahblah position at Blahblah Company. I think you'll find my qualifications to be right in line with what you are seeking. I have five years of experience doing data analysis work with full-scale hurricane data along with excellent organizational skills. For example I can do a load of diapers, my laundry, and my husband's laundry all while breastfeeding my infant son. Of course sometimes the folding and sorting has to wait if the little angel falls asleep on my chest. Further, I think my strong work ethic and attention to detail would make me a great addition to Blahblah Company. Please don't hesitate to contact me with any questions.
Becca Lastname

Oh yeah, and Ryan and I visited Charlie's childcare place on Monday (three days a week, remember?). It seemed very nice and they all loved Charlie and were nice to him and they a bunch of freakydeaky punks who get to play with Charlie all day while I sort through six years of hurricane data (whatever) to please an advisor who will NEVER BE SATISFIED (whatever. whatever). J? If you're reading this? My ONE MONTH OLD is easier to please than you!! On the plus side, Charlie will probably spend a lot less time sleeping in his carseat than he does now. And he'll learn better words there than he does at home with me (who overreacts to everything). Which is good because no one wants a baby screaming "WHY THE HELL CAN'T YOU USE YOUR TURN SIGNAL!" at Grandma's house. So, see? Childcare? Good. Very good.

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