Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Watch it Chubby!

Everything went really well at my checkup yesterday. Dr. O measured my belly and listened to Charlie's heart and everything was as it should be. Dr. O said there's nothing we can do about the way Charlie uses my ribs as his own personal set of monkey bars, but when I told her I've been going through a bottle of Tums a week and having to sleep sitting up, etc she gave me a prescription for Nexium. If I was feeling creative, I would write a love song to my Nexium prescription. Here's a first draft:

Roses are Red
Violets are Blue
Nexium comes straight from Jesus

How many syllables does a haiku have again? So anyway, the appointment went really well until the end when I was waiting in the hall for the bathroom (why does an obstetrician's office have only ONE bathroom???). Dr. O took one last look at my chart and said to me "Ooh, be careful with that weight gain." That's what she said. What I heard was "Lay off the cookies, Chubby!" She said that I don't look like I've gained too much weight (except for my giant Buda belly, obviously) and asked me AND Ryan if I'm eating an abnormal amount of food (which I'm not) and said that since I'm working out regularly that she doesn't really understand it but not to worry about it. She said it'll come right off after delivery. Right. I love many things about Dr. O, but the fact that she has an 8 month old baby and is probably about a size 4 is not one of them. At any rate, the coffee shop has been out of scones for two days and I'm out of discretionary money for the month, so avoiding junk food isn't too bad right now. But on September 1, I think Ryan is going to find me sleeping on the floor in the family room, iPod blasting, surrounded by crumbs and an empty box of United Bakery chocolate chip cookies with a contented smile on my face.

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